My affinity for group fitness was not always what it is today. For most of my adult life, I had a complicated relationship with working out, having never felt like I could find my niche. That was before I became a member of a gym called Grit Fitness here in Dallas. One of my best friends, Hannah, introduced me to it. Hannah and I have known each other since college and therefore, she knows me better than most. She texted me one morning telling me she found a gym that she knew I would love; its hip-hop forward, incredibly inclusive, and there are MURALS OF BEYONCE ON THE WALL, she said. If I’m honest, good vibes and inclusivity speaks to my heart, but this Beyonce painting? I had to see it. Hannah knew that would get me in the door, so I’m so glad she included that little detail. I attended my first class, a 30 minute HIIT class with the owner, Brit, and I was hooked. Not only was the workout killer, but Hannah was right. The vibe was so fun, so inclusive, and the space had such an urban feel. I knew that this was not your average boutique fitness studio, and that was exactly what I had been yearning for.
After attending that first class, I would buy small packages at a time, not quite ready to fully commit. I was also loving a barre class at a fitness studio near my apartment, and my budget did not allow for a two gym membership. So I continued to be a member at the barre studio while sprinkling in Grit classes here and there. And then August of 2018 came, and Laine and I got engaged (best day ever). After the engagement, I told myself I wanted to get serious and consistent about my fitness. It just so happens that right around this time, my favorite barre instructor left the studio I was attending, and so as destiny would have it, I decided to put all my eggs in the Grit basket. I signed up as full-time member in September of 2018 with the intention of getting in fantastic shape for my wedding. I could not have guessed how my attitude towards group fitness would change or predicted how much this community would mean to me.
Fast forward to the beginning of 2019. I was so determined to be in the best shape of my life for my fast approaching wedding day, so I spent five to six days a week at my new gym. I woke up most days at 5AM to attend the 6AM classes and I fell in love with early morning workouts. Walking out of that building at 7AM knowing that my physical activity was done for the day became my new favorite normal. All that talk from Elle Woods about how endorphins make you happy? Turns out she was very right (but then again, she was right about everything). My mental health took a swift turn for the better and my moods were consistently positive. But more than my obsession for that endorphin high, I fell in love with the sea of women that I would, time and time again, find myself working out next to. If you are yearning for a deep sense of community – GIRL. It is hard to beat the bond that is bred from fighting like hell to finish a hard workout class together.
Naturally, I started to attend the same classes every week with the instructors that I really enjoyed. I prefer high energy music, a super motivating teacher, and very challenging formats. One of my favorites quickly became one of the cycle instructors, Erin. Her classes were consistently tough while being extremely fun. But what I grew to love most about Erin is the way in which she connected with her classes. She KNEW those girls riding in that room with her; she cheered their names when climbing a hill and screamed their praise as they sprinted to the finish. I really began to feel that sense of community after I consistently attended her classes week after week.
And then I became one of the girls that Erin knew. She would shout MY name in class, motivating me to keep going; something I had never experienced at any other gym I had been a part of. We became social media friends, so she learned about my upcoming wedding (I annoyingly posted about it on the regular, not sorry). And then, Erin started to do something that made me feel more included than I could have ever imagined. As my wedding got closer and closer, she would call it out in class. “Let’s hear it for Kaila, she’s getting MARRIED in two weeks!”. In so many of her classes I attended, she shouted out a countdown to the day I would be a bride, normalizing my same-sex marriage in a way that I could never thank her for. She made me feel like my wedding and my marriage were to be celebrated just the same as anyone else’s. She played such a vital role in not only my physical health leading up to my wedding, but my mental health as well. She displayed genuine and raw inclusivity; a gift that I cherish deeply.
Erin is just one example of the unmatched inclusiveness that is vital to the DNA of Grit. All of the instructors display what I came to love about this gym – the “come as you are” motto. There is not a judgemental eye in the room, not a competitive tone in sight. It does not matter where your outfit is from and not a person could care if you’re in the best shape of your life or just starting your fitness journey. Every class is full of an array of sizes, a number of different races, and women from all backgrounds. I feel like I am in the presence of true diversity when I’m at Grit. It is a beautiful example of what our world desperately needs more of; less division and more inclusion.
I yearned so deeply to be a more intricate part of the community. I wanted to have the chance to lead the women that I had grown to adore as well as be a part of the team of instructors that I had come to admire. So when the call for instructors was released for cycle training, I said yes before I could talk myself into saying no. And let me tell you, it has been one of the best decision I have made for myself in a long time.
Through training, I met some of the best women that I have ever known. All of us so wildly different with a common goal of wanting to challenge ourselves through this experience. I’ve become very close to two of those women specifically: Allison and Morgan. Allison is the head of nursing in the oncology department at Baylor. She is a beautiful black woman, married to her husband, and has a spirit that shines so bright. Morgan is the bridal buyer for the Neiman Marcus bridal shop in downtown Dallas. She is a gorgeous white woman, straight and single, with a heart of pure gold. As most of you know, I am in the wine industry, am a member of the LGBTQ+ community, and am married to my wife, Laine. Based on the industries that we work in and the lives that we lead, the three of us would have likely never crossed paths if it weren’t for Grit. But now, after having trained with them and worked side by side with them through the season of learning to become successful fitness instructors, we have a bond that feels unbreakable. Fighting through a challenge together creates a special kind of closeness. I will hold their friendship close to my heart forever.
But perhaps most importantly, I have come to love this community as much as I do because of this; through Grit, I have tapped into my why in a deeper way than I ever thought possible. I so desperately hope to show women on a consistent basis that being a part of a marginalized community does not determine your ability to be a leader. To my knowledge, I am the only lesbian instructor at Grit. And in my personal experience, the group fitness instructor community is largely dominated by straight women. I hope to inspire ladies from all walks of life to show up just as they are, no modifications necessary. Be the first. Be the only. Forge a path that has not yet been carved out for you. If I had allowed insecurities about being a gay woman keep me from going after my dream of becoming a cycle instructor, I would have never felt this connected to my reason. My why that has flourished from this experience has cascaded into every corner of my life; it has changed how I show up every day.
Whether you are searching for a community of women, yearning for inspiration, or just looking to improve your physical and mental health; I challenge you to give group fitness a shot. And when searching for just the right gym, I cannot encourage you enough to find a place where you feel like you truly belong. Grit and the women that show up there every single day have changed my life in so many ways. I am so thankful to Brit, the owner of the studios, for her vision in creating such a space. Inside the walls of Grit Fitness, I have learned to persevere. I have been reminded over and over again that everyone is fighting a battle we know nothing about. I have been encouraged to say hello to the woman next to me instead of just entering and exiting without talking to anyone. I have become comfortable being uncomfortable; a lesson that has transformed my perspective. And I have seen first hand what it truly looks like to be a part of a group of women that are cheering each other on rather than tearing each other down, a rare and vital gift. I hope to carry all that I have learned from being a member of this community with me for the rest of my life. And when I am older, with a lot less mobility and a lot more grey hair, I hope I am still riding a bike that goes absolutely nowhere, but not before introducing myself to the woman next to me.
