Blank Canvas

You may be sitting down to read this right now and you can feel a few rolls trying to creep over the top of your jeans. You might have your legs crossed and notice some cellulite that you hadn’t seen before. Or perhaps your bum doesn’t quite seem to fit in the chair that you’re sitting in. Whether it is your tummy flab, your jiggly thighs, or your plump back side, it is all that you can think about. You saw it or felt it and now it is all consuming in your mind.

Why didn’t I work out more this week?

I wish I could sit down and not have rolls on my stomach!

Why couldn’t I have been blessed with stick legs?

Sound familiar? Sis, we have all been there. Whether you are 90 pounds soaking wet or continuously struggling to keep your weight down, we are all victims of this type of self-talk. As women, we are expected to work like hell to get ahead, keep the house clean before it gets out of hand, attend as many of our children’s functions as possible, have an organic dinner ready for the whole family, while also ensuring that our body stays tight and wrinkle-free. I am in sales, and we consistently try to decipher between realistic goals and ones that are simply unattainable. And I can say, with certainty in my soul, that the expectations for women to achieve all of the above would fall far from the category of realistic. The idea of work/life balance and having the skills to manage every moment perfectly is all a facade. I am not a mother yet, so I cannot speak to the challenges that come along with balancing your personal life, as well as being present for your kids. But I am a married, working woman who has been known to beat myself down with negative self talk in regards to my body. I have had days where seeing a glimpse of myself in the mirror has sent me into a self-deprecating episode, full of analyzing every square inch of my body and wishing it could be different. I have been known to allow the number on a scale to ruin the entirety of my day. There are times I see a picture of myself and without warning, I am zooming in to examine my dark eye circles and counting every wrinkle.

I can only imagine that this type of behavior is all too relatable for so many of you. We pick apart every single aspect of ourselves, but we forget to remember why those wrinkles, and why that cellulite, exists on our bodies. I beg the suggestion that we attempt to see our bodies in a different light. And no, I don’t just mean appreciating it for how it looks because we are all beautiful in our own unique way. What I am suggesting is that we work, every day, to take a look at that body and be thankful for all that it DOES for us. To be grateful for everything that it is, and not hyper focus on how it may or may not look. It might seem silly to say, but as women, I believe we forget that our bodies, day in and day out, are working to keep us breathing. We are so critical of how they look that we forget to appreciate that they are working to keep us alive, serving us in the purest way.

You have a beating heart, which keeps you here on earth to continue doing the work that you love.

You’ve got a brain that functions, which allows you to continue to learn and participate in your favorite activities.

You have eyes that can see, which allows you to take in the beauty that this world has to offer.

Your hands can touch and feel, which allows you to hug the ones that you share your life with.

We must shift our mindsets away from insisting that our bodies have only one purpose, and that is to look desirable, by society’s standards, in a bathing suit. Or in this year’s holiday dress. I urge you to remember that your body serves a purpose much more important than how it looks.

Let me be incredibly clear that I am extremely passionate about health. I think it is insanely important that we treat our bodies well by feeding it nutrient rich foods and moving it for at least 30 minutes a day. But what I am suggesting is that we do those things not in hopes of looking a certain way, but instead to ensure that our precious vessel continues to function as it should. So that we can be here, living and loving, as long as possible.

The next time that you find yourself slipping into a state of self-deprecation in regards to your body – whether that be your weight, your wrinkles, or your lack of muscle – I beg that you remind yourself of this: we began this life as a blank canvas. Our skin soft as silk, or eyes free of dark circles. And as we move through life, growing older and wiser, our bodies begin to become pieces of art. A personal painting that tells the story of our lives.

Those dark circles are a testament to all of the sleepless nights that you were up feeding your newborn, a job only you could fulfill. Women all across the world would give anything for your dark circles, just to have the chance to be a mama.

Those extra few pounds are remnants of all of the pasta and wine that you consumed on that trip of a lifetime, one that you’d always wished to go on. So many people can only dream of being able to take a trip like yours.

Those extra wrinkles around your eyes serve as a constant reminder to just how much your spouse has made you belly laugh throughout your life together. What others wouldn’t give to have that many crows-feet, all from a life well-lived with their best friend.

That bloated tummy is proof of the large piece of cake you had last night, a dessert from the birthday party your family threw for you. Thousands of humans would take that belly bloat if it meant a family that loved them enough to throw them a cake-filled celebration.

You see, nothing is more important than giving yourself the freedom and the chance to experience a grand life that leaves you with reasons to be grateful. If we are consistently obsessing over that stubborn 10 pounds or that wrinkly skin, we will forget to make room for joy. We will forget to make cherished memories, ones that fill in the spaces that tell the story of our existence. Just imagine how someone fighting for their life would feel. I can promise they would not be yearning for a flatter stomach. Or wishing away their under eye-bags. I can bet they would willingly embrace a few more tummy rolls if it meant another delicious meal with their loved ones. And I am certain they would take 100 more face wrinkles if it meant more time to laugh with their people. Do not get to the end of your life with a canvas full of blank spaces; it will break every inch of your heart.

We are either victims or products of our perception. It can elevate our lives or work to deteriorate it. Gratitude is a choice. Finding reasons to be thankful in our darkest corners could be what ultimately changes our life. It may just be what finally sets us free. Might I suggest that we all make an effort to shift our mindset. To appreciate our bodies for keeping us alive and cherish those experiences that paint evidence which tells the stories of our adventures. The markings and extra few pounds that serve as a testament to memories made. Let’s continue to ensure that we are treating our bodies well. But let us not ever forget to practice immense gratitude for all of the proof on our canvases that we have not only lived, but we have lived damn well.